The struggle for agency: a narrative look at the gay experience

Abstract

The purpose of this study is to explore the transformation of populations whose histories are defined by marginalization, struggle, and under-representation. A postmodern perspective will guide this qualitative approach as I explore the complexities inherent in the posited questions. The feminist paradigm coupled with the newly articulated concepts of Queer Theory will guide the inquiry as these emancipatory frameworks provide meaning for the emergent nature of the discussion. The focus will be on one of the most invisible and obviously marginalized populations of our day—gay, lesbian, trans-gendered, bisexual, and youth who are questioning their sexual identity. The transformative nature of the study is historically contextualized by parallels drawn from the struggles of other historically marginalized populations, such as Women, African-Americans, and Hispanic-Americans. The history and struggles of these populations provide a backdrop that captures the depth, the emotionality, and the complexity of the current study. This study will focus on the search for identity and meaning for individuals who live in a dominant culture that offers little more than "lip service" in the acknowledgement of their worth and their contributions. Maslow articulated in his Hierarcy of Human Needs, the need for human beings to feel a sense of belonging (Hackman, Johnson, 1996, p. 76). This belonging comes from the self-awareness of where we are in our journey...a respect for change and growth, and a sense that we are active participants in all of it. How, then, do we feel a sense of belonging if we are living in a society that often times ignores or maligns our existence? ("We", in this case, can be anyone not recognized as valued under the webbing cast by the dominant culture). Furthermore, how do we find meaning for our role in the world? The importance of establishing identity isn't so much that we might establish identity, but much more frightening, the idea that we might not establish identity...then what? Are we then left to drift upon the waters of complacency, when all that may be needed is an acknowledgement that how we know of ourselves is valid, regardless of familial, political, social, and/or environmental limitations? This study will seek to reclaim the silenced history of a LGBTQ population and through that analysis find a place for celebration and meaning. The goal of this study and the hope of this author is that as this population finds their voice, their world, and their reality, they will be valued as contributing members of a diverse community. The insights offered by this rich, storied, narrative analysis, will inform the journey into the world of LGBTQ youth.